After a serious breakup, we should always be careful in exercising our judgment. The whole sorry experience has left many couples psychologically and emotionally disoriented so we should be more tactful and careful how much we trust our instincts. Understandably, you’re hurt and lonely and you want your relationship to work again.  So the obvious route to follow is to head straight back in there, right?  You need to get him back and be with him, convince yourself and him that you haven’t really parted and you can just pick things up as if nothing ever happened.

But that’s very rarely the right way to proceed.  It’s too soon; you’re still unclear about what went wrong and what you want.  He’s probably just as confused.  At best, you’ll end up back together in a relationship that still has a problem left unresolved; at worst, you’ll push him away for good.

It’s far wiser to break off all contact for a while.  It will give you time to sort things out in your own mind and heart as well as allowing you the space to rebuild your life and rediscover all the good things in it.  At the same time, if he still does care for you, he’ll be so struck by your absence that he won’t be able to stop himself thinking about you.  Thinking can quickly turn to wanting and needing.

As they say, “you never know what you’ve got till it’s gone”.  This way, he might realize how much he took you for granted when you were together. That could even make him be the one to take the first steps towards reconciliation and it might also mean that once you do get him back, you’ll be stronger than ever.  But stay confident and take your time.