Dirty talking is form of sensuous talking teasing your partner; to inflame and encourage them erotically.  While enhancing your sexual experience you not only seek to free yourself from your inhibitions, but also to drive them wild with your verbal erotica.

What you say therefore, is of prime importance when you dirty talk. Talking about anything that might bore your partner, turn them off, or worse offend them, is something you want to avoid at all costs.

How to talk dirty – what to avoid:

1. Work - If it is about an erotic fantasy set in the environs of your office, go ahead. Otherwise, leave work outside your bedroom door. There is nothing sexy in hearing about your daily grind and talking about it will bore or irk your partner.

2. Complaints – Sex is a joyful experience. Complaining about other people or your life in general can be very energy sapping and could show you up in poor light. Dirty talking is a positive experience while complaining is a negative one. They will simply cancel themselves out.

3. Watching the clock – Being in a hurry and looking at your watch repeatedly will make you seem distracted and not quite there. When you do not give your partner your full attention, you do not do them justice. Dirty talk has to be leisurely and relaxed. Slow your self down and get the watch out of sight!

4. Inadvertent humiliation – Be careful not to hurt your partners’ feelings.  Using crude words that will deflate and injure their ego will secretly earn you a lot of resentment and anger. These are definitely not two emotions that will lead to great sex. Complementing your partner and making them feel good about themselves should be your aim.

What you can do:

Keep away from topics that your partner dislike, especially if you do not know them well and you have not had the opportunity to ask, or find our for yourself, about their preferences.

If it goes disastrously wrong the first time you try it, you might not feel good enough to try another time. Respecting their space and learning not to trample on feelings is the sensitive thing to do.